Sugar dispenser, I miss you (AKA, I hate sugar packets!)

Okay, it’s time for a rant.  Why, may I ask, have seemingly all the coffee shops in Seattle decided to abandon the convenience and practicality of the sugar dispenser?  Why have they chosen to dole out sugar in teeny-tiny packets that take forever to collect, open, throw away, and otherwise use?  What is behind this madness?

Seriously, I miss the sugar dispenser.  I, like many others I would imagine, enjoy drinking my coffee with a fair amount of sugar.  But sugar packets are in every way designed to thwart my quantity preference for sugar in my coffee, and are therefore totally impractical for me.  Oh sugar packets, how I hate thee!  Let me count the ways: (1) you come in so many different sizes depending on the coffee shop, so I never know how much I need to put in to get that perfect, savory cup of coffee; (2) when you come in particularly small sizes, I try to minimize the amount of time you suck from my life by grouping you together, but that always, always results in disaster: (a) sugar on the counter top, (b) sugar stuck in the packets, (c) wrappers everywhere, and (d) my complete and utter frustration (as well as for the people behind me who have been waiting for this sugar debacle to end so that they can next partake  in the sugar packet madness!); (3) sometimes, instead of being partially filled with sugar so that I can easily grab and open you, you’re completely filled with sugar, making it impossible for me to open you without sugar falling out and/or flying in my face; (4) because I always have to use multiple packets to get enough sugar into my coffee, sometimes you fall into my coffee, contaminating it with all the putrid, unpleasant crap that was probably festering on your surface; (5) sugar packets make me think of raw sugar, which I absolutely, positively hate with a passion.  Everyone always tells me, “oh, you should use raw sugar!  It’s healthier and it tastes better!”  Folks, raw sugar is crap.  For starters, I don’t know why, but unlike white sugar, which evenly distributes throughout my coffee when I stir it, raw sugar always settles at the bottom of my coffee and sits there like a pile of undigested food, making 80% of the coffee sugarless until you get to the bottom 20%, when suddenly all the sugar hits at once and makes your coffee taste like Kool-aid on steroids.  Also, I have never once detected any difference in the taste of raw sugar as compared to white sugar.  If anything, it tastes worse because it gives me a headache since I always end up sipping it in a ridiculously concentrated state from the bottom of my coffee.  I will always go to whatever lengths I can to avoid using raw sugar, which is a horrible, despicable, pathetic excuse for a sweetener; (6) sugar substitutes like Sweet’n Low or Equal are designed to give you sufficient sweetness in a pre-determined, measured amount, and it therefore makes sense to use packets for these; but that reasoning doesn’t apply to white sugar at all!  If I want to add a lot of sugar to my coffee, I should be able to without being limited to a bite-sized packet.  Using sugar packets to add generous amounts of sugar to your coffee is like taking your clothes out of the dryer one by one instead of dumping them all out at once into a laundry basket.  It’s inefficient, and it just doesn’t make sense.

I could go on, but I think I’ve made my point.

This is a plea to bring back the sugar dispenser.  It’d be so much more convenient for you, other patrons in the coffee shop, and for the folks who work in the coffee shop who won’t need to clean up the mess I always leave from sugar packets.  I’m not claiming that my time is so important that I can’t afford to stand over a counter for a little extra time filling up my coffee with sugar packets, but it sure does add up over time if you think about it.   This is just an item of basic convenience.  It just makes sense.

Please, bring back the sugar dispenser.

2 Responses to Sugar dispenser, I miss you (AKA, I hate sugar packets!)

  1. Most of the people feel that the sugar packages are safer compare with the jar. Bad person can slip some bad thing in there.

  2. Sorry, I don’t buy it. It’d be much easier (in fact, probably smarter) to slip something into milk canister than a sugar dispenser. If potential contamination were the rationale for using sugar packets, coffee shops wouldn’t put milk out for customers to use on their own.

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